Lindsay Lohan's at it again... Forgive Her? Forgive Her Not?

Drones - How you doin' tonight?  I'm doing really good.  Just lit and hit the bong.  I am good...  All the time...   All the time....   I am good.  I hope you get the reference.  Less I digress....

Some of you may remember my last devotion for Dearest Lindsay Lohan.  This week she got accused of stealing some fancy necklace.  If she was in Les Miserables, the friar would have given her earrings to to boot....  Anyways....  She started reaching out to me while she was in rehab.  I reached back, but she kept giving me the cold shoulder.  I don't think she could handle someone as awesome as me.  Less I digress.

Word on the streets is Lindsay is getting advice from, none other than, Charlie Sheen.  Seriously Lindsay?  Charlie Sheen?  Wow.  I don't even know what to say...

Azazelle has gone AWOL.  I believe Azazelle has been reincarnated  as Charlie Sheen.  Lindsay is getting advice from the bad girl's bad guy...  Ugh.  I can see it now...  Lindsay asks Charlie what to do...  Charlie gives her that weird deer in the headlight look contemplating his answer.  I'm bracing myself for his answer.  Charlie responds, "So Lindsay, when you're lighting the pipe try and hold your lighter thusly. That way you won't burn your wrist as often."  Jesus.  Is at all this clown can muster?  

So what we have here is the blind leading the blind.  Can you see it?  They both got their white canes playing in traffic.  I see it.  I see Lindsay hanging on Charlie's arm while he fumbles from the curb into oncoming traffic.  She got her white cane under her arm.  The next thing you know, people are honking at them...  Charlie starts swinging his arms like an orangutan having a seizure and begins cursing like some guy with turrets .  Lindsay begins shrieking like a girl yelling all kinds of vulgarities at Charlie.    Horns are honking.  Birds are flying.  Both of them making a spectacle of themselves....


On one hand, they are perfect for each other.  It's like they've been living a parallel existence and one of their lines magically collided with the other and here we have a couple made in hell.


Oh Lindsay...  I don't know what to do now....  Obviously Betty Ford didn't bring us together..  If she can't do it, no one can.  The good thing is Mary won't be all jealous.  She tends to be kind of possessive sometimes... But, I forgive her and I find this little quirk endearing.  


So....  As I sit here and reflect on the entire situation staring into a fresh picked daisy I've been holding.  I pull off one petal and say, "Forgive her?"  Pull another petal and say "Forgive her not?" And we repeat the process until I get to the last petal.  "Forgive Her?"  Forgive Her Not?" "Forgive Her?"  Forgive Her Not?" "Forgive Her?"  Forgive Her Not?" "Forgive Her?"  Forgive Her Not?" "Forgive Her?"  Forgive Her Not?" "Forgive Her?"  Forgive Her Not?""Forgive Her?"  Forgive Her Not?" "Forgive Her?"  Forgive Her Not?" "Forgive Her?"  Forgive Her Not?" 


And....  I'm out of petals... Oh well.  There you have it.


Love - The Alpha and the Omega.