Greetings. I just got off the phone with Mother Nature trying to comfort her. She was weeping over the crisis in the gulf. Seriously. All the water being contaminated. The animals and fishies getting covered in goo. What a mess. Her tears were flowing like niagara falls. She is mourning the destruction. Her heart is heavy. She wonders if your addiction to oil is worth ruining the ecosystem I made for you. It was bound to happen. The risks associated with getting my black gold would eventually catch up to you. You think this is bad? Wait until the next one. Leave my planet alone. You'll be sorry. How bad do I have to make it before you stop messing with it?
What do I do to resolve the situation? I offer forgiveness to those who caused this. How lame. It's what I do. I forgive those who ask and accept me as their lord and savior. At least I'm consistent.
Less I digress...
I know for a fact there is a farmer in Iowa that knows exactly how to plug that well. The problem is no one will listen to him because he's "just a farmer." Hm.
In the meantime, the goo will continue gushing from the hole until someone can think outside the box and listen to some good ol' southern engineering from my man in Iowa.
Love, Jesus
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