Jesus Inc. (NYSE: JSUS)

Investors and Shareholders - After much consideration and debate I, along with the disciples, apostles and Azazel decided a name change to our corporation is needed.  We are growing extremely fast - almost like an upstart.  Innovation is alive and well due to the great team we assembled in January.  During one of the meetings, Pope Lavartheus stated Jesus, Inc. was confusing.  The name needed some pizazz.  Some punch added to it.

During out telephone polling about speaking in tongues we also asked people about Jesus, Inc.  People would say things like - Jesus?  Jesus.  Who's Jesus?  JESUS jeeZUS - we heard all kinds of unusual takes on a timeless name...

The executive council held a brainstorming session in the conference room at our new corporate headquarters in New Hope, PA.  We hired an obscenely overpriced consultant to facilitate the meeting.  We were throwing beach balls, brain storming for ideas, generating mind maps, talking about mission statements and the whole 9 yards.  Breaks were 30 minutes in duration and started every hour on the hour and every half hour.  It's amazing we got anything done?!?!?!  Less I digress....

We had the AH HAH! moment.  The epiphany if you will.  Someone (I can't remember who) blurted out we should have an exclamation point at the end of Jesus.  So it looks like this - Jesus!  Brilliant - absolutely brilliant.  The exclamation point solidifies my position.  The way I should be seen in the world.  The excitement of my message.  The excitement of MY brand.  JESUS!  People want to know me.  People love  knowing me.  People love my message of hope, love and forgiveness.  The promise of everlasting life.  The forgiveness of sins.  Redemption.  It's all because of JESUS!

I'm reminded of a bumper sticker:

No Piece?
Know Jesus!
Know Peace.

Jesus!  JESUS!  J-E-S-U-S!  JEEEESUUUUSSSS.  It reminds of a song:

The was a God and Jesus was his name-O...  J-E-S-U-S, J-E-S-U-S and Jesus was his name-O.

*clap* E-S-U-S *clap* E-S-U-S and Jesus was his name-O.

You get the idea.

We understand our old name was LAME-O so we improved it with a simple mark of punctuation.  The explanation point!  Brilliant.  So, effective today, we are now JESUS! Inc. (NYSE: JSUS).

Your life partner and friend - JESUS!!!