Hello Faithful Ones - Let's start with Steve Job's (he does one of the greatest imitations of me to date) little 'iPad.' I personally would have called it 'The God Slate.' Just imagine Moses descending from on high with The God Slate. He'd come down the mountain holding the slate behind his back. I can see it now - a big goofy grin on his face all excited to show it to the people. He asks them, "Which Hand?" They guess a couple times and he finally reveals it. Moses brings it to his lips and kisses it much the way Tiger Woods (one of my greatest human works who got stung by Azazel) kisses a trophy. He presses the little button and triumphantly he raises it over his head for the world to see. Behold: the 10 commandments brightly beaming from the slate in bright, content rich digital multimedia with lots of cool, interactive demonstration videos, power points and study guides for use in small groups. The people are mesmerized. Just imagine the impact we could have had then. Too bad technology had not caught up with our vision for the future back in the day. The God Slate would have been so much easier to lug down that steep hill, too.
Speaking of digital media, here's a little analogy. Pope Lavartheus Lemillius I is to Pope Benedict XVI as Karl Rove is to George Bush. Benedict is Pinocchio and Lemillius is Geppetto. Jesus Inc. (NYSE: JSUS) has embraced blogging and having a rich, multimedia web presence since contra inception. We've been trying it for a while and being online has worked exceptionally well for us. We effectively reach our target demographic of tech-savvy professional men and women between the ages of 18 and 37 earning an average salary of $90,000. So, Pope Lavartheus Lemillius and I had a "meeting" with Benedict. We strongly encouraged him to present the wonders of technology to the ordained brotherhood. All people sharing my word need to have an online presence.
As a matter of fact, I was just on the phone with Lemillius and he suggested we buy more server space and sell templates for our less technologically inclined clergy folk to use. Monthly hosting starts at 9 pieces of silver per month with a one time setup charge of 30 silver pieces. The mailers are being sent tomorrow.
I look forward to the day when all houses of worship and clergy members become part of the digital age. The more people who come to know me, the better. We will be more popular than ever!
Heavenly Yours - Jesus.
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